FEAR IN REVERSE

       I had a real "Aha!" moment this week. Stay with me for a minute on this one.
       I have a new student for a one-on-one class. Let's call him Joko. He's about 40, with a slight paunch, thinning hair and a wispy goatee. He wears round specs on his round face. He looks like a nice guy, and smiles easily. He is Javan at least several generations back, and in my experience, Javans are cultured, circumspect, and very polite.
       Pak Joko works as a project manager for his construction company. They are about to send him to the U.S. for some project work and more language training. He will leave his wife and kids to live in a major American city for three months or so. Does some of that sound familiar?
       The other night, in the middle of a grammar point, Joko looked up and said, "Mr. John, can I ask a question?" 
        "Of course." I waited for a follow-up question on the present progressive tense.
        " I will be living in a big American city on my own. And you know, I am Muslim. I worry a little...will people be nice to me?"
       Pak Joko's question hung in the air for a minute while I remembered my own concerns about coming to live in the largest Muslim country on earth. There had been some anti-Western demonstrations in Jakarta, and my friends and family counseled me to be careful. My memory brought back a taste of the trepidation.
       And suddenly, there it was. A picture of my own fears coming over here as a Westerner, sitting in front of me, "in reverse." It felt like a Higher Power orchestrated this lesson to show me that fear of prejudice is universal, depending only on who you are and where you find yourself.  
       Then my mind went to a video clip I saw recently in The Huffington Post. It showed Terry Jones, the Quran-burning preacher, standing on a soap box in Times Square preaching hate, and soon being drowned out by a crowd that spontaneously sings the Beatles' All You Need Is Love. See the clip here:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/18/terry-jones-all-you-need-love_n_2323094.html
       What would Joko think if he came upon a scene like this? How will he deal with the in-your-face, say-what-you-feel reality of big-city America?
       Wait. This man is looking at me expectantly, and I see vulnerability in his eyes.  How shall I answer his question? How would you answer it?
       "Pak Joko, I felt the same way when I came here. Don't worry. You are a good man, you are friendly, and you speak English very well. Anyone you meet will see your good heart. Besides, there are many different kinds of people in America's big cities, from all over the world. Many Muslims, too. I think Americans will like you very much."
       He nodded, and we went back to the lesson. Did he feel comforted?
       
       Here is an amazing statistic, something that I marvel at daily: since my arrival in Indonesia almost two months ago, I have yet to encounter ONE moment of intentional rudeness from a local person. Indonesians drive crazy, and they don't queue up like Westerners, but they are incredibly warm and unfailingly helpful. They are curious without being aggressive. And I feel very safe and secure. One teacher friend of mine, a Brit who has lived here for nine years, cites the Indonesian people as the reason why he stays. "Yeah, Surabaya is dirty and polluted for sure, but the people...have you noticed how nice they are?" I nodded, and told him I had to admit he was right about that.
         Back to my student. 
         I feel protective of him, even as I know I can't help him once he arrives Stateside. I have faith, though. I do believe people will see Joko's good heart and intentions. 
        So to my American friends: Please. If you see a slightly chubby man with round specs and brown skin, do me a favor and give him a smile. You could be what he remembers about America.